cool

Ferris bueller the Fonz, Marty Mcfly, bill & ted, Scott Pligrim, Samuel L Jackson

All have one thing in common. There are cool

Cool enough, that telling them that they are cool, it is uncool.

So cool, that if they were dressed as babies and admitted a love of Bananarama, they will still pull it off and be cool.

My issue is, and an issue that all others face in the world is –

Am I cool?

By saying this I am not cool.

But I think I am, my hair is great. I know all about the greatest movies and I’m in to indie and electro bands - ranging from the mainstream to underground (a terminology that I hate, it makes bands sound like some sort of mutant amphibian group that like pizza)

I would like everyone to know that I am cool, but that means I am not cool, so letting no one know I am cool means that I am either.

A) cool

B) uncool

C) just a being on the planet we called earth – who thinks to much and decides to write blogs about being cool (thus I am uncool) (Im uncool by the fact I keep on starting that I am either cool or uncool)

No wonder no one has written a scientific report on being cool.

Imagine if Einstein spent his life thinking of making himself cool. We would then not have the equation E=MC² everyone knows it, but many do not understand it (I do!!)

So what can I do with my predicament………….

Well when we think of cool people we know that

A) they know stuff and the people that are important

B) they can dress the height of fashion

C) they are also where the party is

D) ‘girls want to be with them, guys want to be them’

Therefore if I want to be cool I must, watch documentaries and read Wikipedia, plus network with those that are important (in every kind of field!) I must read the fashion tips in men’s magazines, go to parties and most importantly believe that I am the Fonz/ Ferris Bueller thus I can emulate them and get girls!

Actually that sounds like too much work, has no one realised being uncool is just pure laziness.

The kind of laziness I love.

FUCK IT - I LOVE BEING UNCOOL